Let’s talk about the age old question, can your ex ever be your next?
It’s a loaded question, obviously. There are those relationships that are just plain poisonous: the unfaithful, the emotionally abusive, or the physically abusive. That ex should never be your next: good for you for getting out and don’t ever look back.
But, then there are those relationships that ended because one of you wasn’t ready, or one of you moved away, or one of you wanted to dip your fingers in somebody else’s honey pot without being unfaithful… the list goes on. The point is, the relationship ended in a way that didn’t leave one of you internally broken or outrageously angry, just a little bit bummed out and perhaps a tad insulted.
Now, I’m not advocating a purposeful relapse, here. By all means, move on with your life, grow as an individual, have a fulfilling career, get a pet, join a club… do whatever it is that you do to enjoy life. But, on the offhand chance that you living your life leads you back to someone from your past… you don’t need to fight it. Chances are, they’ve been doing the exact same thing you were: growing as an individual, having a fulfilling career, getting pets, joining clubs… whatever.
Point is: they are no longer the person they were during your previous relationship, just like you are no longer the person you were.
Extrapolation?
Any new relationship you embark on together will have an entirely different outcome. Different people, different outcome. Different outcome… hope for the future.
I’m not saying I have that relationship in my past that I wonder…
if I’ll see him again…
what kind of person I’ll be…
what kind of person he’ll be…
I’m not saying that,
but… maybe I am.
But you can’t spend your time and energy wondering about things like that. Live your life. Enjoy it. If someone comes into your life, it doesn’t matter if they are old or new…
If they enhance your life, let ’em stay.
Enhancement should always be the goal, right?
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I’ve been going through this a lot with my ex. Every time I think that we’re ready to get back together he does something to royally mess it up and remind me what I’m glad we’re not together. It is incredibly hard to move away from exs though when the break up was fairly mutual and not about betrayal or something horrid, but just because something else needed to be taken care of first.
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Why are your posts always so relevant to my life?? Lol, good read, thanks for the perspective, I needed that. Keep writing! 😀
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