Post-Dating Etiquette

This is a follow-up to Dating Etiquette, and should only be read by those of you gentlemen who have mastered the previous post’s instructions.

I’ll break this into three parts, since there are three ways that any guy can leave a date:

You want a second date, you don’t want a second date, or you just want to have sex with her.

Feel free to scroll down to the one that most closely matches your personal feelings.

As an aside- this is directed at males since they seem to be the ones who don’t understand dating propriety.

*You Want a Second Date*

  • Don’t talk to your friends about her

I’m sure you’re excited to show me off or whatever, but save it.  When you involve other people, you also involve their opinions.  Since you’re a guy, your friends are also probably guys, and will therefore give you terrible advice on how to move forward in our ‘relationship’.  Trust me, don’t do it to yourself.

  • Don’t wait

I’m sure the wait three days rule is still floating around somewhere, but in this technological world we live in, please disregard it.  If you like me, let me know.  Treat it like a job interview: as soon as you’re done, send a short message to your potential employer/girlfriend thanking them for the opportunity.  I, like many employers, pay close attention to things like that, as it shows how much the opportunity means to you.

  • Call her

I know you thrive on the ability to text, but avoid it.  After that first, follow-up text letting me know you enjoyed yourself, call for your next date.  If you make it to the second date, we are now ‘dating’, albeit, non-exclusively, but dating nonetheless.  I don’t date guys who ask me out via text.

*You Don’t Want a Second Date*

  • Be honest

I will wait to hear from you after our date.  When you don’t contact me, if I’m smart I will realize this means you’re not into me, and will leave it alone.  If I’m not smart I will hit you up myself.  In this case, no matter how difficult it is, be honest.  Don’t put me through weeks of stalling because you don’t know how to say six simple words: I’m just not that into you.  Trust me, I’m a big girl, it’s not going to devastate me… Ignoring me might.

  • Don’t talk to your friends about her

At this point, the only reason you’d be talking about me is to say something unfortunate.  Don’t be immature.  If you’re not into me, then I shouldn’t be worth discussing.  Besides, imagine how awkward it would be for you if I found out something you said and then publicly called you out on it…

*You Just Want Sex*

  • Be honest

Don’t attempt to keep dating me if you have no intention of dating me.  It’s a waste of everyone’s time, especially since you’re probably not the best actor and I’m going to figure it out eventually.  Do me the respect and just tell me that while you do find me extremely attractive, you don’t see it going anywhere.  Let me decide for myself if I’m interested in just being casual, and be prepared to deal with whatever my decision is.

  • Stop dating

If you aren’t into me like that but are still interested in having sex with me instead of going out and finding someone you are more compatible with, you probably shouldn’t be dating anyone at all.  You are clearly still too immature for a relationship and need to spend some quality time alone before venturing back out into the real world.


Best of luck to you, gents!

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  1. “As an aside- this is directed at males since they seem to be the ones who don’t understand dating propriety.”

    I think the split is really “people who care about others” and “people who care about themselves” and not necessarily guys vs girls. I feel similar to a lot of the stuff you post about but in my view the “bad guys” are actually girls. Interesting when reading from the opposite gender POV.



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