To be clear, I am not referring to good girls in the sense of no swearing, no attitude, long sleeves, eyes down girls, but just regular girls who are just looking to be loved.
I am also not referring to bad boys in the sense of leather-jacket wearing, tattoo having, sexy-looking motorcycle hunks, but self-absorbed jerks who are currently incapable of treating a woman right.
Good means good… and bad actually does mean bad.
Take a brief detour to Lupe Fiasco’s new song Bitch Bad…It explains that really well.
I lament my own personal obsession with bad boys. Why is it that every girl looking for love constantly falls in with the boys who have no interest in making her happy?
Because we love the chase. Good boys make it too easy for us, because they too are looking for love. In our crazy little minds we think that the ease with which we can be with a good boy means that there isn’t any passion in the relationship… but this is so wrong.
Bad boys ain’t no good… Good boys ain’t no fun.
-Mary J. Blige, Mr. Wrong
This is a sign of immaturity. Real love is not the aggressive, biting, and occasionally hate-filled passion of True Blood… it is the ability to have someone who always has your back, actually cares to hear what you did the day before, and thinks of you before they think of themselves. “Anyone can be passionate… but it takes real lovers to be silly” – Rose Franken
The worst part about it is that I recognize this problem with myself, but I feel like I don’t know how to stop it. Is it something that we have to grow out of eventually, or is it possible to force ourselves to love the right person?
For me, I know that despite all of these trials and tribulations, when I’ve had enough, I will have had enough. I think most females are this way as well. There is so much that we put up in the name of hope, but eventually, we will break.
The key is understanding yourself and your own needs enough to prevent any lasting damage as you wade through the mess of youth.